Swallowing Your Pride

On the weekend I said some things I later regretted. I had a phone call with someone I love and I wasn’t supportive or loving, instead I spoke with anger and inflicted my own opinions onto them.

After I hung up I felt terrible. I guess I was filled with regret and remorse and wished I had handled it differently. In the past I would have sat on this feeling for days, perhaps even eventually convinced myself that the person deserved it and that I was right. In fact I may have even been right this time but that doesn’t change the way I felt in that moment. I had not treated this person with the respect they deserved so I had to fix it.

I wasn’t quite ready to speak with them again so I emailed them. I apologized and asked that they forgive me. They did, and not only did they forgive me but they asked for their own forgiveness. This showed me how opening ourselves up to others and admitting when we are wrong can lead to a better relationship.

It’s hard to admit when we are wrong and that we stepped out of line but what good does it serve if we don’t? The relationship is then the one that suffers. So I am grateful for this weekend’s lesson as I discovered that personal relationships are far more important than my own pride. 

Wu Feng

Courage is speaking your truth then living your truth.

Its one thing to believe and say you'll do something but another to act on that belief. What is the saying ... walk the talk? ... practice what you preach?

I read the most amazing story of courage this morning about a man called Wu Feng. Let me share it with you.

Wu Feng was a Manchurian diplomat who lived in the 1700's who was posted with an aboriginal tribe in the outskirts of Taiwan. Wu Feng befriended the aboriginal chief, whose tribe beheaded one of its members every year as a form of sacrifice.

Each year Wu Feng pleaded with all of his compassion and reverence for life, that the Chief put to an end to this custom. The Chief would listen respectfully as Wu Feng would plead, and then after listening and bowing, the Chief would summon the chosen tribe member and without hesitation behead him.

Finally, after living with the tribe for 25 years, Wu Feng once more pleaded with the Chief to stop this senseless killing. But this time, when the tribe member was called forth, Wu Feng took his place and said "If you will kill this time, it will be me".

The chief stared long into his friends eyes, and having grown to love Wu Feng, he could not kill him. From that day, the practice of beheading stopped. 

Wu Feng walked his talk that day, lived his truth and stood for what he believed in. That is courage.

Life Is A Puzzle

I often think how broken we all are. How that no matter who we are or where we come from we all have parts of us that need healing. We all need to be put back together just like a jigsaw puzzle.

A puzzle isn't a puzzle without its broken pieces as its the broken bits that make it a puzzle. Much like us, its the broken bits, the parts of us that need to be put back together that make us into who we are.

If we weren't broken and already a perfect canvas than what fun would that be? Like the jigsaw puzzle that wasn't broken into pieces, whats the point!

Life is picking up the pieces and no matter how many attempts it may take you, keep placing them until they are a perfect fit.

Make Cleaning Fun (or at least a happy time)

This is what I deal with on a regular basis. This mess and it makes me mad. I get so cranky that my days are spent cleaning it up for it only to get this way and worse the next day and even an hour later.

Today I've decided to look at this differently as I didn't want to be cranky today. So here goes ....

1. Had it not been for this 'mess' and the creation of it then I wouldn't have been able to sit and eat breakfast in peace this morning. Thanks to this mess entertaining my children I didn't have to.

2. Its forced cleaning! Today I will sort these drawers and unit out for good and put things were they belong. The kids have just made it easier for me by pulling everything out. I don't have to do that part anymore :-)

3. Look. I actually have a mess to clean. Yay! That means that I own stuff. There are people in this world who have nothing. Not even a roof over their heads. I should be grateful for this as it means that I have stuff to clean.

4. That this mess is my biggest concern at the moment. How good must my life be if this is what annoys me and pisses me off.

Gee I should do this more often. I feel so much better about this mess now. Try it, try it with anything that gets to you. List some positives out of it. This is something I only just then decided to do then and it has worked.

Note: An hour later I cleaned up that mess (which in fact was much worse than the photo would have you believe) and when I did I actually almost enjoyed it.

Yerba Mate - It Had Me Thinking

Recently I've discovered herbal teas and I drink some of the most unusual concoctions.

For example, my latest is a tea called "Yerba Mate". I have this tea in the morning which is apparently made from a holy tree found in South America. It is said to be a real energy booster and a great replacement for coffee.

This morning as I enjoyed yet another cup of this tea I couldn't help but wander who it was and how it was that they discovered that certain trees, plants and leaves can be brewed into teas. I'm grateful that they did.

Today I'm grateful for all those that go out on a limb. Who do things that to most other people would appear crazy, yet in doing so they discover something magical. I guess its the only way to discover magic is to step outside the box we all live in and from what is safe and normal to what is unknown. To venture out into the undiscovered because when you do you may just discover a whole new world.

Letters of Love

Every night before bed I try and write a letter to myself. A small note filled with love and positive things. Sounds crazy hey? But its oh so good. Honestly you must try this.

Its I guess you could say, a love letter to myself. I write it before I go to sleep at night so that when I wake up I read it. I try and make it one of the first things I read and hear in the morning.

I'm feeling brave and want to give you an example so I'll share with you a little of what I wrote to myself last night.

"Your so beautiful Nicole. I love you. You are destined for great things. You are worthy of life's riches, welcome them. Welcome life. You are amazing"

Now can you imagine reading that as soon as you get up! It makes me feel good and so loved and just starts my day out perfectly. I'd like to say that I don't need it but believe me I do. We all do. How often are you told such nice things about yourself? Proably not as often as you should be.


There was a time in my life where I would have thought the above was the most crazy and self absorbed thing a person could do. Now however I see it as the best thing a person can do.

Why wait for someone else to write you a love letter when you can write one yourself. Love yourself and say I love you to the person who needs it most - you! Tell yourself and tell yourself regularly. 

We all give our love away when inside we are dying for it back. Give it back. Give it back today.

Trees Cry Too ... We Just Don't Hear Them.

I saw a tree cut down the other day. It broke me.

This tree wasn't cut, it was mutilated. A big truck was called in to chain itself to the top of it so that it could then be pulled and ripped from the earth.

To many it was just a tree but to me its life. A life wanting to live. Do you know how much we need trees and how much we rely on them to live? Without them we would literally suffocate.

I was thinking how easy it is to do - cut down a tree. Because it doesn't fight back and we can't hear it cry. It just allows and gives itself to us. The tree let these men rip it from the earth the same way a baby or young child allows abuse, but that doesn't make it ok.

I want to live in a world where life is respected and revered, not taken. I walked past that tree again today and only his stump remains. I am still unsure as to why it was taken. Perhaps the owner of the house found him an eyesore or its leaves falling onto their roof an annoyance.If only they knew just how much that beautiful 40 foot gum was giving them.


* This post is dedicated to that tree and the trees that are taken so unfairly.

Conditions on Love

Unconditional love is something a mother has for her child and something I'm personally working on, that is, to love unconditionally.

Not many of us do. We might think we do, but we don't.

The other day I realised how I was being very conditional in my love. As in most our relationships there are ups and downs. I had spent an entire weekend giving all my love,  I was being so loving, so kind and giving all of me to only have the love constantly rejected and pushed away. I was hurt. Really hurt.

So what did I do? I withdrew. I held back my love and went on with my day not showing any love for this person. Why? Because I wasn't getting any back.

It was later that I realised how conditional I was being. I was so obviously only loving them at the time to get something out of it myself. For them to be kind, helpful and loving back to me. But that isn't how love works and it was a huge lesson for me.

Love is something we give because its in us and we can't help but give it. It isn't something we trade for something in return. Love isn't currency, its a gift.

As a mother I love my children always despite their faults and how they treat me. I have been hit, yelled at, ignored and called many hurtful things by my chidlren yet I still love them. Always. Why because there is no conditions to my love for them.

Love should be this way. All love. Love for ourselves, neighbours, strangers, husbands and wives. Not only for our children.

This is one lesson I am still learning. To uncondition my conditions on my love.

Boston Marathon Bombing

Its 12pm and I log onto facebook for the first time today and my news feed is filled with news about Boston. I have been thinking about this, the Boston news and I can't help but wander why so many are interested. So many people are posting about it?? Why is it getting so much media attention? 3 people have died I understand? But why do people care so much?

I am not saying that what has happened isnt horrible and doesn't deserve our prayers but I can't help but wander why everyone is so interested in particular event?

Surely most of us realise that every day 25,000 die of starvation. 5 and more children die from physical abuse a day, and a average of 1,500 a murdered a day.

So why is it that so many are caring about Boston so much? I don't want this in any way to be taken as cold hearted from me. Far from. The world is in dire need of Love. The world needs love! The world we live in at the moment is dominated by fear and the Boston events add to this. Adding fear to all those that chose to let it. Watching the news and allowing yourself to feel the fear and then share the fear with others is ADDING to the fear. It is in no way helping.

The world at times wants us to live in fear, our news is dominated by fear based stories. Not love. There is love in the world and there is love at this time. For example. I just read that after these bombings many of the runners who completed the race then ran into the nearest hospital to donate blood. Love. Many people came from everywhere to help and offer support in anyway they can - love. This is what I want to hear about this is what I want to read. I stopped watching, reading, listening to the news years ago. It only tries to invoke fear into us all. Fear and that the world is a bad place to live. It isn't. However it would be if you only ever heard the bad stories.

What occurred in Boston is horrible but sadly much worse occurs every day. Its time to offer our hearts, love and healing to these events and to not add to them by adding more fear and hatred. Lets make this world a place we all want to live. And don't for one minute ever believe that you, and you alone cannot make a difference because you are the only person that can! You are the only person, thing, event and situation you can ever control. Walk yourself into love and out of fear ♥

Wings Are Made To Fly

 

Wings are made to fly. I heard that line in a song this morning and it had me thinking...

Wings ARE made to fly. Birds are born with wings because they are beings of flight and we are born with hearts because we are beings of love. Hearts are made to love, to be loved and to share love.

Just as the baby bird needs to be pushed from its nest to know it can fly we too sometimes need our hearts broken to know that they are there.

I Love To Pay Bills.

Paying my water and sewerage bill the other day I did what I normally do and thanked it. You see whenever a bill arrives now, I view it differently. I no longer pay it from a place of anger or regret. I pay it from a place of giving and try to pay it with love and gratitude in my heart. Ok this all sounds crazy I know, I too thought that when I first read it but since trying it I can actually see the good it’s doing.

Money isn’t something to hold on to and this is something I am still learning. Money is to be circulated and shared. Without sharing money it wouldn’t go around and wouldn’t be passed on from person to person and that includes you. 

If we all held onto our money we would only have what we have now. There would be no incoming money and no outgoing money. You would just have what you have and that’s it. In life we need exchange. We need money to circulate. So paying a bill is a part of that process. Its moving the money along and paying for a service. So whenever I pay a bill I look at it that way and I also look at it as an exchange for a service provided to me.

For example the other day I paid our water and sewage bill. In the past I would grudgedly pay the few hundred dollars and feel hard done by that MY money was being taken from me. Not now, now when a bill arrives, I smile at it and see it for what it is and pay it.

 I paid the water and sewage bill and as I did I felt grateful that we have the luxury of clean fresh running water provided instantly every hour of every day to our house. I also was thankful that we have a sewerage system where I live and that I personally don’t have to deal with it. 

I felt grateful that I live in a house that has plumbing, hot showers and cold water to drink. When you feel and look at a bill this way its much easier to pay, even if the money is tight it makes you realize exactly what it is your paying for and that every dollar spent is worth it <3

The Love You Need

You don’t need anyone else in your life to validate you for you to feel loved and worthy. You already are. There is no need to look to others to love you when you have all the love you need. It’s right there inside you. 

I was thinking about this last night. How we often look to others to feel loved and how we yearn for them to appreciate us so that we can, only then appreciate and love ourselves. But what if they don’t love you or give you the respect you deserve? Then what will you do? I’ll tell you what you’ll do …

You’ll go on and love yourself anyway. You already are everything. Your perfect and you were born that way.

A Childs Art

The other day I was looking at a drawing  my 4 year old had drawn me and I had a moment of realization. To me his drawing was perfect. It was what you would expect from a 4 year old, but I then started to think that if an adult had done the exact same picture it wouldn’t be accepted, and certainly wouldn’t be classed as good. It was scribble. 

I thought about this some more and realized art is art. It comes from your heart and is what it is. It isn’t right nor wrong, its just an expression of the artist.

So why is it that if I had drawn that same drawing it would be considered, well ... crap! This is what had me thinking. You see we as adults place judgments and expectations on things, everything. As an adult we would criticize and judge our art and not accept it as a mother does her child's. 

What is the difference between a child's art and an adults? Nothing. The difference is us, the ones that judge it.  

A mother doesn’t judge her child but the question is would she be so kind if it were her own drawing...

I Can Provide

This morning my youngest was whinging at me. Crying and pulling at my legs and feet whilst I was trying to eat breakfast. It was hard not to get annoyed. I knew why he was like this too. He was hungry. He wanted to eat also. So I quickly finished my breakfast as fast as I could and fed him. 

When I was feeding him I thought about all those mothers and parents who are unable to feed their children. Who have no food to feed them and how hard it must be to watch a child of yours suffer in pain and hunger.  It was then that I felt such gratitude that I am able to provide for my children and will never have to watch them go hungry.

Today I send all my love to those who don’t have the choice. Who watch their children on a daily basis suffer in pain and hunger.