I
wanted to share something that occurred today as it’s in relation to
what I was saying yesterday about the messages we are sending our
children. Although most of us never ever intend to send these messages
to our kids we do it so frequently without even realising. Take today
for example ….
I decided today to pick my eldest up from school 20 minutes early so that my 17 month old and 4 year old could play in the playground.
Not long after arriving a young boy around 2 years old ran up to my youngest
and gave him the biggest cuddle. It was so big that it became a tackle
and knocked him over. My 17 month old fell backwards and hit his head on the
ground and the young boy landed on top of him. His mother came running
over and began to apologise to me profusely. But what she did next is
what upset me.
She began to yell at her son. She told him how
naughty what he did was and how bad he is and gave him a little smack on
his bottom. As I stood there all I could think of was her son and what
he was being taught in that very moment.
I explained to the
mother that my son was ok and how beautiful and loving her son was. I
explained to her that her son was only trying to cuddle and give my 17 month old
love and that it was really sweet. She apologised again saying she
doesn’t know what’s wrong with him and walked off.
The rest of
the time at the playground all I could think about was what this boy had
just learnt. He learnt that seeing someone you like and love and giving
them affection is naughty, wrong and makes you bad person. He didn’t
mean to knock my youngest over and to fall on top of him he was just a little
too enthusiastic with his love, and if you ask me there is nothing wrong
with that. The world needs a little more enthusiasm when it comes to
love.
This sort of thing happens every day. I too am guilty of
it at times, like with Julian and his vegemite and cream and how tempted
I was to tell him it was wrong and he was silly for wanting it. We have
an important job as parents, the most important of all jobs - we are
raising our future. It is our children that will take this world in the
direction we want it to go and quite frankly I can see where it’s
heading if we continue our old ways …..
The grass is always greener on the other side, right? Well I'm here to tell you its not.
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Do You Know Best?
Today I gave my youngest boys pikelets for lunch. My 17 month old had Jam and
Cream – the only way to have them and my 4 year old, well he wanted vegemite and cream.
I was about to say no and tell him
that he had to have jam and cream as vegemite and cream would be disgusting and
that it was a silly idea. But I stopped myself and thought about it and how
often I do this. How often I insist that ‘my’ way is the right way. That I know
best. I do, but I only know what’s best for ME, not others.
Personally I couldn’t think of anything worse on a pikelet
than vegemite and cream but for my 4 year old perhaps it was the best combo ever. So I
made it - vegemite and cream and he ate the whole thing.
Had I made him what I wanted and thought he should have had
what would this tell him? On a deep level it would tell him that he doesn’t
know what’s best for him, that he should always do what others tell him to do
and not what he wants to do. Not a message I want to be teaching my boys…
I do it so often to, insist my way is right and that I know
best, but I’m slowly learning and re teaching myself that I only know what’s
best for me and not others.
Labels:
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Monday, August 26, 2013
Caged Birds
I like to believe I live with an open heart. So open it
hurts. I cry for others pain, I cry for the innocent, I cry for guilty but I
also love like I’ve never loved before.
My latest pain is caged birds. No bird should ever be
caged! A Bird is born to fly, to spread
its wings and do what it was born to do. A bird wasn’t given wings to sit in a
cage.
I know a caged bird. He sits in the nursing home I visit. He
is so sad. He hardly chirps, only ever occasionally when he spots his own
reflection in the mirror. He thinks for a moment he has company and is happy,
it is short lived as he soon remembers he sits alone . He sits awaiting his own
death never flying at all, never having felt wind beneath his wings.
Again I am only one person but how can I make this better?
How can I stop the madness of the world we live in? A world that cages birds!
Why? Because they make good ornaments and decorations? Or is their company that
we seek, yet how often is that company shared?
If you own a caged bird when was the last time you really
looked at him or her. What did you see? I doubt you saw peace in his eyes…
Tonight I pray that no bird shall ever be caged and that the
birds that are, fly free.
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Syria Under Attack...
Some of the victims of this attack. Innocent Children.
Today I heard of there was an attack in Syria where at least 1300 innocent people and more were killed by what was believed to be a gassing. Children also among the dead.
It saddens, upsets and angers me that we live in a world like this.
I often wonder what I can do. Because we can call all do something. Being mad and angry wont help the situation only add to it, like fuel does to a fire. What I can do is love. I can add love to this world and not hate anger or fear.
I can be nice to those that aren’t to me, I can treat all those I encounter with love and kindness, irrespective of their views, thoughts, beliefs and nationality. I can smile at the child who sits alone and help the lady who is having difficulty with her children. I can choose to bite my tongue when tempted to say something that is hurtful, I can put my own judgments aside and choose to see only the good in people and know that deep down within us all is love and goodness.
I do realise that I alone may not be able to change the world but I can change me!
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
You Have It So Good.
Making my 17 month old lunch I felt so incredibly grateful that I can feed my children. Always.
It reminded me of
something I heard the other day that touched me in so many ways and is
bound to reach into your hearts and grab you as it did me. Especially
mothers.
A friend of mine told me about a friend of his who
recently traveled to Africa to help out in many of the aid programs they
have there. In the first few days of her stay she saw the conditions
that these people lived in daily, they were hungry, suffering from
malnutrition and lived in what many of us would describe as
unimaginable. However what stuck her most is what she witnessed one
night.
A mother sat in her hut with her three children who were
nearly all bones. The children were crying with hunger and begging
their mother for food. The mother found a big pot, filled it with water
and boiled it over a fire. She told the children that she has some meat
and it will take a very long time to
cook. Eventually the children fell to sleep crying and tired of waiting
and awoke to find their mother and the empty pot. They went to their
mother asking if the meat was ready and their mother simply said “I’m
sorry but it cooked whilst you were asleep and have missed it, the meat
is now gone”.
The lady who witnessed this said she was changed
that day. I have to say I am too. My heart tore open as I felt that
mothers pain and also felt that mothers love. That mother loved her
children so very much that she couldn’t tell them they had no food, she
didn’t want to starve them of the one thing they had, hope. How
beautiful that mother was. She couldn’t feed her children food but she
could still feed them hope, she couldn’t bring herself to tell her
children that there was no food and she wasn’t sure if there ever would
be….
Think about this the next time you complain that you’re
hungry, or when your food is served cold and you wish it were more to
your liking. Or how about when you go to your cupboard and say ‘there is
nothing to eat’ when your cupboard is full of food it’s just food you
don’t want to eat at this time. Think of that mother and her children
who right at this very moment are boiling water full of hope.
Be grateful for your life. You have it so good.
Monday, August 5, 2013
Your Breasts Aren't You.
If there is one body part of mine that I would change it would be my breasts. They are much smaller than I would like. Today I again thought how this body part ‘fails’ me when I realised that they are perfect. They are mine and this is how I was made.
There are things in life I can change such as my attitude, house, belongings and what I wear each day but I cannot change how God made me. Yeah sure I could go ‘buy’ some but why? So I feel more lovable? More feminine? Happier ….
I may feel some of the above for a while but it won’t last. Because we all know that deep down its the love of yourself and who you are and not the love of your body that is vital, and It’s that person I am learning to love despite her casing.
I have friends who have had breasts enhancements and know that more and more women today are getting these procedures done and I’m beginning to ask why?
We are all perfect the way we are. We are not our breast size. If we all had ‘boob jobs’ where would the variety be? If we all had blonde hair … how boring! We were made different for a reason and we are all perfect in our own different way. Why be like someone else when your perfect at being you.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Bread Crust Can Bring Joy
What I loved today was noticing we had left over bread crusts. I was taking my boys out anyway and decided last minute to take the crusts with us so we could feed the ducks on the way. Simple things. Simple things like feeding ducks breadcrumbs can bring joy to not only the ducks (who were extremely grateful for the feed) but to my boys who felt delight in doing so.
Life really is simple. We only complicate it. Children do not need fancy toys, games or expensive trips away they only need you and us to show them that life is already exciting and that all they’ll ever need is here <3
Labels:
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Saturday, August 3, 2013
Doctors Do More They Save Your Life ... They Dedicate Theirs.
Thinking
about doctors I realised how grateful I was for them and particularly
those that choose to be one. It’s a commitment of 10 years (and more for
surgeons) to study and learn a job that in so vital in our society.
Every day surgeons perform life saving operations on thousands of
people in this country and countries all around the world. Operations
that take many, MANY hours and its not normally until you need one
yourself that you realize their value.
So today (even though I
don't need an operation) I am still grateful for all those who dedicate
their lives to save others, because without them and the work they do,
well, where would that leave us?
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Which Half Are You?
I was thinking about the glass half full or empty question earlier
today and remember being asked it when I was younger, whether I thought the
glass was half empty or full. I always answered that it was half empty and was surprised
when I was told that the better answer was to see it as half full rather than half
empty. To me it was actually both and I didn’t see how me saying it was half
empty was a bad thing. Now as I’m older I understand what this question is all
about. How you view life.
So today randomly, in
my own random thoughts, as I noticed a glass half full and half empty on the
bench I asked myself the same question again. Is it half empty or half full?
My answer was immediately …. “I see a glass that needs
filling!” a mum thing perhaps, but then again I realised this pretty much sums
up how I view life these days.
I see a glass that although is half full still has room for
more. We all have ‘empty’ bits, bits that need filling with all the wonderful
things in life. Your glass may be half full and that is a great thing, to be
positive and focus on the full parts of your life, but we all must remember that parts of us
are empty too and it’s those parts that I try to fill each day.
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